How to prepare your children for a divorce.

family1-960x640Parents often decide on and discuss a divorce for a long time before telling the children about it. For many families and the Fort Mill SC and Rock Hill SC areas it can be a daunting task to try and prepare for. When there is a peaceful accord between the parents, it can help when delivering the news to the children. Depending on their age, it can take a lot of time to fully explain the idea. One of the most important things that needs to be established is the fact that the divorce is not their fault. Many children feel torn and guilty when their parents divorce, often wondering if the burden of raising them is causing the break up. When sitting down and discussing the divorce, make it clear that it has nothing to do with them and that they are still loved the same by both parents.

Discussing and deciding custody.

For matters of custody, especially in school-aged children, the child’s feelings should be taken into account. Younger children, typically below the age of five are somewhat easier to console during a divorce. However, older children and especially teenagers, requires more consideration and involvement. Some parents agree on the matter before discussing it with their children, but that can be devastating for some. At times, older children can fight the decision and if dispute arises between the parents, then a neutral party is required. A Guardian ad Litem is the neutral party assigned by the court to determine what the best interest of the children are. They will talk with both parents and children individually and evaluate the financial capabilities of the parents as well. It is important to include older children in the divorce discussion before trying to make a final decision on the matter.

Remaining calm and supportive is important when discussing divorce with your children.

Most children do not want to be without both their parents. More than the couple themselves, children can be greatly disturbed by a divorce. Once it is decided to be only solution between the parents, the matter of custody should then be discussed with the children. This is especially true for when one parent decides to move away from the area. In some instances, one of the parents may not be able to properly care for the child or children and it is especially important to ensure they understand that their leaving is not due to loving them any less. Assure children that communication and support will remain as available as it always was. You can also have them meet with the Rock Hill SC or For Mill SC divorce lawyer. Allowing children to be informed and involved can help them grasp and understand the situation better. When preparing your child or children for divorce, it is imperative that they understand the ending of a marriage is not the ending of family.